


To Be Lost Only Until Found Again

by MMH_Enthusiast



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst with a Happy Ending, Damn you google translate, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Merlin likes to speak Gaelic to Eggsy, Merlin's name is Alasdair, Mostly because I love the sound of Gaelic, Possibly inaccurate Gaelic, Wingfic, and because how could you not love the idea of Merlin speaking Gaelic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2017-12-11
Packaged: 2019-02-13 12:09:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12983766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MMH_Enthusiast/pseuds/MMH_Enthusiast
Summary: Eggsy goes on a mission but things go sideways and he gets captured and tortured. What happens after he is rescued but not soon enough to avoid permanent damage?





	1. To Be Lost...

**Author's Note:**

> I dubbed Merlin's real name to be Alasdair in this fic. anarchycox wrote some Merwin where his name is Alisdair (in his series Merlin A/B/O trilogy. It's a great series, highly recomend) and I liked it. Also I looked up what the name meant and it said "defending men" and I thought it worked since Merlin is the handler (I could be wrong though).  
> There is a little bit of Scottish Gaelic in this fic (mostly Merlin using endearments because I'm totally nuts for that) and I'll translate at the end of each chapter but be warned: I got the translations off of google so sorry if they are a little bit off.  
> I did try and make Eggsy's talking more like chav speak so bare with me if it's not very good.

Eggsy could slowly feel the tendrils of consciousness pulling at his mind. He scrunched up his nose, smelling the antiseptic of the room and shifted, trying to go back to sleep. However, he groaned when he felt something blocking his movements the same time he felt a stab of pain throughout different parts of his body, but not really able to tell where exactly.

“Easy, lad. It’s all right.”

Merlin. He could hear the man somewhere next to him. Suddenly Eggsy was aware that one of his hands was being held and there was something stroking his cheek.

“Come on, Eggsy. Let me see those beautiful green eyes of yours.”

Unable to say no to that deep accented voice, and wanting to see the man himself, Eggsy slowly began to crack his eyes open, groaning at the light as it filtered in. Finally able to blink away the fog, he saw Merlin leaning in front of him, charcoal wings slightly tensed behind him and a small smile on his lips as Eggsy looked up at him clearly. Looking up at the gruff man before him, Eggsy did notice the fatigue that seemed to surround his boyfriend; There were bags under his eyes and his wings were drooping with exhaustion, indicating he had had even more sleepless nights than the tech genius would usually put in – which is saying a lot.

“You look like shite, bruv.”

“There we are. Nice of you to finally wake up, mo ghràdh (1)”, Merlin chuckled, wings shuffling slightly with the movement in his shoulders.

Still a little disoriented, Eggsy asked, “How long ‘ave I been out?”

“About four days. The doctors had to put you into a small coma to reduce some brain swelling from the concussion and to help speed up your body’s healing some.”

Eggsy frowned, trying to remember why he was in the hospital in the first place. Only remembering hazy bits of a mission, he asked, “Wha’ happened?”

The Merlin’s eyes seemed to dim although his face remained mostly unaffected by the question; Eggsy would have thought he was just seeing things but the man’s wings drooped almost imperceptibly. This set Eggsy a little on edge although he did squeeze Merlin’s hand lightly, and leaned into the hand still cupping his cheek. Merlin gave him a fond look before leaning in for a small, gentle kiss which left Eggsy with a warm feeling in his chest. The tech wizard then pulled away, withdrawing the hand from Eggsy’s face, before sitting down in the chair next to his bed.

Stroking the knuckles of Eggsy’s hand, he asked, “How much do you remember?”

“Not much. I remember I was on a mission and somewhere along the way it went sideways…” Eggsy faltered, as he began to remember, little by little. Eggsy remembered darkness and screaming. He remembered being surrounded by tall, wing-less blokes, wings chained behind him while is hands were bound above him and feet bound below him. He remembered his shirt being removed and then… pain, lots of pain.

All of a sudden Merlin was standing in front of him again, wings shuffling and lips moving, but Eggsy couldn’t hear him, could barely see him. All he could focus on was the memory of pain being inflicted on his body. Now feeling the dull aches clearly – only dull no doubt due to whatever pain relievers running through his system at the moment – he couldn’t stop his mind from cataloguing all of his injuries: head slightly pounding from the concussion, right shoulder aching from dislocation, left leg throbbing from a laceration – knife wound? – that went from hip to knee, various cuts and bruises along his front torso, bruised and possibly cracked ribs, and his wings…

As if someone dumped ice cold water on him, Eggsy could hear Merlin again, as well as his own painful, fast-paced breathing which was loud in his ears.

“Eggsy, look at me. I’m right here. Breath with me, lad. Deep breaths. That’s it, mo chridhe (2). You’re okay, your safe.”

Having finally able to get his breathing under control once more, he looked directly into his boyfriend’s hazel eyes when he asked, “How bad is it, Merlin?”

Eggsy saw traces of sorrow that anyone else wouldn’t have been able to see creep into the man’s eyes as Merlin hesitated to answer, wings dipping low. He could tell Merlin knew exactly what he was referring to.

“How. Bad.” Eggsy gritted out when the older man still had yet to respond.

“Main humorous of the left wing dislocated, right one fractured; lacerations across major muscles in both; some primary and secondary feathers torn out by the root on both”, Merlin said quietly.

Although unspoken by his lover, Eggsy knew what all of that meant. “I’ll never fly again.”

With it out in the open, Eggsy looked down at his free hand which hung from a sling – due to the dislocated shoulder, his mind supplied. He felt Merlin squeeze his other hand but couldn’t acknowledge it. He’d never be able to dance with the clouds again. Unable to accept this outright, he dragged his eyes back up to Merlin’s ones.

“I want to see.”

The older man’s eyes widened slightly, shock written all along his face, “Eggsy, I don’t think –”

“Merlin, you either help me stand up in front of that mirror or I do it without your help”, he could hear the ice in his voice and knew he shouldn’t snap at his boyfriend but he couldn’t help it. Eggsy needed to see it or he knew he wouldn’t be able to believe it.

Merlin continued to stare at him momentarily – probably trying to decide if he thought he’d be able to stop Eggsy from standing without hurting him – before he nodded slightly and moved to help Eggsy out of bed. Once they got Eggsy standing, weight balanced between his uninjured leg and Merlin, the older man practically had to carry Eggsy in front of the mirror across the room. The entire ordeal was nearly black-out painful, but Eggsy refused to stop until he saw his wings. Finally standing in front of the mirror, he turned to see his once beautiful chocolate brown wings that were almost black towards the bottom; both were highly bandaged and one obviously broken. He could see the ruffled look of the lighter of feathers at the very top of his wings peeking through bandages; as his gaze drew lower, Eggsy began to see torn out spots of were darker feather were meant to lay until his eyes were locked onto where his near black feather should be. There were gapping holes of missing feathers, giving off a wrecked look were there used to be beauty. Eggsy’s eyes got blurry, unwanted tears obscuring his view of his crippled wings. He felt Merlin carry him back to the bed, gently laying them down, his head on Merlin’s chest with Merlin’s own grey-black wings wrapping around the two of them in a sort of protective bubble. He heard Merlin whispering in his ear, trying to comfort him, as he held Eggsy as close as possible without crushing him and stroked his hair. All the while, the injured agent mourned the loss of the one thing that kept him free as a kid. The one thing that both caused him trouble as well as kept him safe. The one thing that let him touch the sky. The thing he knew he felt lost without.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) mo ghràdh: my love  
> (2) mo chridhe: my heart


	2. ...Only Until...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter kind of got away from me so it's a bit longer than the first... sorry, not sorry :)

Merlin had held Eggsy until the lad had cried himself to sleep. Once the younger man fell asleep, Merlin promised himself to do whatever it took to help Eggsy fly again. He knew how precious flying was to his boyfriend. Eggsy had told him that without his wings as a boy, he may have gotten into a bit more trouble, being the cheeky little rascal he was, but they also allowed him to protect his family as well as keep hope for a better life for them. While trying to figure out how to help his partner, different prosthetic designs beginning to float around in his head, the tech wizard leaned down to nuzzle the head resting against his chest, wings wrapping around them a little tighter. Merlin heard Eggsy make a contented sound before nuzzling farther into the older man’s chest. With a small smile on his face, Merlin fell asleep with plans floating in his brain.

…………………………

Merlin knocked on the door of Eggsy’s hospital room before slipping inside. It had been two weeks since Eggsy had been put in the Kingsman’s hospital, meaning it had only about a week and a half since Eggsy had first woken up. The lad’s dislocated shoulder as well as the dislocation of his left wing had healed along with most of the small cuts and bruises adorning his body. The doctors were hesitant to allow Eggsy’s release due to the gash on his leg, especially after the standing stunt, as well as to watch the healing of the lacerations on his wings.

Not too long after Eggsy first woke up, the tech wizard had to get back to work. Nevertheless, Merlin always came to visit his partner whenever he could either bring his work with him or eat with the lad. But today was different; when Merlin stepped in, his charcoal wings relaxed behind him, he found Eggsy once again standing in front of the mirror, still putting no weight on his injured leg, staring at his chocolate brown wings with a glossy, unseeing look on his face. Merlin’s heart broke a little at the sight. Moving slowly towards Eggsy, he softly called out to his lover. No response. Wings tensing behind him, Merlin stopped within touching distance and noticed Eggsy’s breathing was slightly erratic; not quite the hyper-ventilating like that first day but not steady.

“Eggsy?” Merlin whispered again, laying a hand on the lad’s shoulder.

Eggsy flinched away from the hand on his shoulder, instincts leading him to try to flare out his wings as well as put pressure on his bad leg in order to step away. The boy cried out in agony as he began to crumple to the floor. Before he could fall completely to the ground and injure himself further, however, Merlin caught hold of the young man, his own wings flaring out to balance them. Gently holding onto the injured agent, the tech genius brought Eggsy over to the bed. As he sat him down, he noticed the lad’s eyes were once again clear, back in the present, but still not looking at Merlin. Merlin cupped his boyfriend’s cheek and slowly began stroke it with his thumb, hoping the boy would look up and talk to him.

“They were makin’ sure I wouldn’ be able to escape before they removed ‘em.”

Eggsy’s quiet statement caught Merlin off guard. Stifling his own anger at the lad’s tormenters, Merlin brought the hand not on the lad’s face to one of Eggsy’s hands, squeezing the appendage.

“The blokes were wing-less. They wanted ta remove my wings and mount ‘em… like a fuckin’ _trophy_.”

Eggsy’s voice slightly rose when he had spit his words out at the end. As much as it pained him to see his lover in agony, Merlin knew the only comfort he could give the young man in front of him right now was to listen.

“Funny thing is, if someone offered to amputate ‘em right now, I’d let ‘em. As much as I ‘ad loved my wings before, I can’t ‘elp but _hate_ them now.”

The pure venom on the word hate was audible. Merlin continued to stroke the man’s face and hold his hand in silence, letting him get some of the anger out of his system.

“Instead of the freedom and beauty I used ta see in ‘em, all I see now is _pain_. They’ve become an agonizin’ reminder of what I’ve lost.”

Eggsy paused to look up at him, tears brimming in his eyes.

“How is someone supposed ta keep goin’ when one of the most precious things in their life ‘as been taken away?”

Tears began to freely fall down the broken man’s face.

“How is someone supposed ta move on when there is a _constant taunt_ about wha’ they used to have perched on their back, visible _every single fuckin’ day for the rest of their life_ with jus’ a stray look in the mirror?”

Merlin removed his hand from Eggsy’s so that both of his hands cupped his lover’s cheeks, thumbs wiping away the tears.

“Alasdair, ‘ow am I supposed to keep living, never being able to touch the sky again?”

The tech genius, having never heard the lad so broken before, leaned forward to rest his forehead against his lover’s and, with closed eyes, whispered, “Gràdh mo chridhe. Chan fheum thu sgiathan gus an speur a cheangal. (1)”

Merlin pulled back to place a kiss on the lad’s forehead, then looked into those devastated green eyes. “Eggsy, I will do everything in my power to help you fly again. I promise, flying is not lost to you.”

Merlin paused, watching both the doubt and hope sparking in the green pools looking back at him. “Until then, I am right here for you, leannan (2). Anything you need. We will take this one step at a time… together.”

It felt like Merlin sat there for an eternity, waiting for a response from Eggsy, until, finally, the lad nodded slowly. At this, Merlin gently scooped up his lover to lay him back, then climbed into the bed himself so the lad was resting his head against Merlin’s chest. Merlin brought one of his dark wings to wrap around them as he held Eggsy to his chest. They stayed like that until Eggsy fell asleep and Merlin had to reluctantly return to work, where he continued to sketch out designs for the damaged wings of his partner.

…………………………

Merlin heard a rustle of feathers and clothing before a nearly inaudible sigh came from his left. He looked over at Eggsy, who was sitting in a chair next to his desk, noticing the lad was trying to conceal the grimace that had pulled over his features. Glancing down, he realized that Eggsy was massaging his newly recovered leg and a small frown came to Merlin’s face.

“Still hurting you?”

Eggsy shrugged and grimaced slightly at the motion.

“Wings too?”

Eggsy rolled his eyes, “I’m fine, Merls.”

Merlin gave the man a look before frowning and turning back to work.

“Babe, you are such a worry wart.”

Merlin could hear the smirk in the lad’s voice and rolled his eyes, not deigning to give a response to that, as he shifted his grey wings into a more comfortable position. They sat in a comfortable silence once more, until he heard his boyfriend begin to fidget in his seat. Once again looking at the mostly-healed agent, he saw the lad was attempting to reach his remaining unhealed injury – the fractured wing – using a pencil of all things.

“Lad, what are you doing?”

“My wing’s itchy. Why the ‘ell do broken bones itch so much?”

“Because it’s healing”, pausing as Eggsy found the itchy spot, if Merlin judged the look of bliss on his face correctly, before telling him, “Now would you sit still? I’m almost done.”

Eggsy put the pencil down and nodded. The two were going to go out for lunch – because once Eggsy could get around without a wheelchair he forced Merlin into agreeing to taking a break from work, even if that work was for the lad’s wings – once Merlin was finished so they could celebrate Eggsy’s release from the hospital. Merlin turned back to his work, attempting to finish up what he was doing, before he heard the lad going through one of the drawers near him. His wings twitched slightly and with a fond but exasperated sigh, Merlin turned and look at the man with one eyebrow raised, “Eggsy.”

Looking a bit sheepish, the lad closed the desk drawer and put his hands in his lap, “Sorry.”

A few minutes later, just as Eggsy began to start tapping a foot in impatience, Merlin closed everything on his computer down and turned to his lover, “Alright, I’m done.”

Eggsy jumped up, “Fuckin’ finally!”

Merlin raised an unimpressed eyebrow once more.

“Wot? I’ve been stuck in the hospital for a month. I’ve been dying to do somethin’ other than sittin’ around.”

Merlin chuckled at that, thinking about all of the complaining Eggsy had done in the last week, and got out of his chair. The two began to head out, Eggsy’s walk still containing a slight limp, when Eggsy moved to hold the tech genius’s hand. Merlin glanced over and knew his boyfriend was going to be okay. After all, even though Eggsy had mostly accepted the situation at this point, besides the looks of longing Merlin has seen the lad give his wings when he didn’t think Merlin was watching, it shouldn’t be too long until his lover would be able to fly once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) Gràdh mo chridhe. Chan fheum thu sgiathan gus an speur a cheangal.: Love of my heart. You do not need wings to touch the sky.  
> (2) leannan: lover


	3. ...Found Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for a good ol' happy ending. I'm not super happy with how it turned out but hope you like it :)

Despite the devastation and anger Eggsy had felt at finding out his wings could no longer carry him to the heavens, he had been able to accept it. Mostly. At first, for the first week after he had woken up, every time he would get a glimpse of someone flying from his window, the only thing Eggsy felt was jealously and some resentment. He had kept those feelings away from Merlin, not wanting to push the man away and to keep him from worrying. After having his breakdown, when Merlin told him he was going to help Eggsy fly again, those feelings weren’t as strong anymore. He did, however, miss flying more than ever. He hated the feeling of being grounded. But then, when he was released from the hospital, he felt that weight lighten somewhat, now that he was at least able to walk somewhere. No longer cooped up, it didn’t hurt as much to see the clouds and not be able to chase them like those around him as it had before. The hardest thing to adjust to, though, had been that not only would he not be able to fly, he couldn’t even stretch out his wings properly for a while, both having been cut up and one of them being broken. Nevertheless, just like the rest of his injuries, his wings healed.

For the first time in two months, Eggsy was able to move his wings. Having just gotten the cast removed from his broken wing, Eggsy looked at himself in the mirror, staring at his folded up disheveled-looking wings for the first time without any bandages. The smaller feathers were beginning to grow back in but there were still non-feathered spots sporadically placed along his wings; his missing flight feathers wouldn’t ever grow back, leaving his wings with a chaotic look to them. Eggsy knew that his wings would one day have the beautiful gradient of light to dark brown in his wings again – being light brown at the top and continuously becoming a darker shade until nearly black – but he wouldn’t ever see the nearly black feathers that were essential to flying at their full potential again; there were would forever be gaps of missing feathers in his wings.

Eggsy heard a knock at his door, shaking him out of his thoughts, and he turned to see Merlin slipping into the room, his gradient grey-to-black wings folded neatly behind him. Merlin gave him a once-over before saying, “Looking good, Eggsy.”

“Feelin’ good, Merlin”, Eggsy responded with a smile before turning back to his reflection.

“Have you stretched out your wings yet, lad?”

“Not yet.”

Eggsy heard the man move closer until the man became visible in the mirror. He stood behind Eggsy, chest brushing his wings slightly, and nuzzled his face into the side of Eggsy’s neck, hands on Eggsy’s hips and wings opening up slightly.

“I’m right here, Gràdh mo chridhe (1). Whatever you need”, Merlin whispered into his neck, giving it a small kiss before backing up so as to give him some room.

Eggsy smiled, heart warming with the knowledge that his partner was close at hand if he needed him and turned back to look at his wings once more. Taking a deep breath, the agent slowly began to stretch out his wings; they were stiff from not being stretched for so long, making the process a little slow going and slightly painful. As his wings continued to open up more and more, Eggsy felt the air tickle his feathers and Eggsy couldn’t help but close his eyes at the wonderful feeling. However, feeling his wings come to full span, he slowly opened his eyes to look in the mirror. As he stared at his wings, not looking as disarrayed as when they were folded, Eggsy let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. It still hurt to see his wings so damaged, but not as much as when they had still been bandaged up.

“May I, leannan (2)?”

Eggsy pulled his eyes from his wings back to the man behind him. Merlin hadn’t moved from where he was standing behind Eggsy, but he now had a hand outstretched towards the agent’s wings, his own wings flared out somewhat. Eggsy nodded, having been deprived of his lover’s gentle touch on his wings for the past two months. He watched the man’s hand through the mirror, slowly draw closer, in anticipation. Once he felt Merlin’s fingers lightly touch an unharmed section of feathers, making his wing twitch slightly, he sighed; Eggsy’s wings felt touch almost as touch-starved. The tech wizard stroked the feathers gently, moving his hand from the center of his wing outwards, towards the end. As he brushed along a small unfeatheard spot on his wing, Eggsy shivered, the feeling very foreign to him. Merlin moved across his entire wing, making sure not a single spot didn’t go untouched, he then moved to the other wing and gave it the same attention. As soon as both had been fully lathered with attention, Eggsy buzzing with warmth and practically purring like a cat, green eyes half-lidded, Eggsy watched the older man move to stand directly behind him once more. When the older man got there, Merlin ran his fingers in the space on Eggy’s back, between his wings; this made Eggsy shiver again under the attention. Merlin then dipped down and kissed his way up Eggsy’s spine. Reaching the back of his neck Merlin brought his beautiful hazel eyes up to lock onto Eggsy’s half-lidded ones in the mirror. Eggsy turned his head, trying to see the man without the help of the mirror, and Merlin captured his lips. Eggsy’s wings dipped down towards the floor, completely relaxing as the kiss continued. After a moment they separated and Eggsy made a contented sound before withdrawing his wings somewhat, but keeping them mostly flared after having had them cramped for so long. He turned to face the older man and wrapped his arms around Merlin’s neck.

“Thank you, Alasdair. For bein’ there every step of the way.”

“Always, mo leth eile (3)”, smiled the older man in front of him.

…………………………

It was nearly a week later when Eggsy went onto his first field mission since being put in the hospital. It was a simple surveillance mission, but he had deviated from his orders in order to get some intel that was worth risking the mission for. The entire thing went without a hitch but for the entire mission, Eggsy could only think of the things that would have made it easier and more efficient had he still been capable of flight.

…………………………

Another week after that, Eggsy got into his first fire-fight since becoming flightless. He got out with no more bruises than normal, but nearly got captured because his instinct to fly made him hesitate before using his legs instead. The agent dreamt about his tormentors taking away his flight that night.

…………………………

“Galahad, report to my office as soon as you can.”

Hearing Merlin use his codename, Eggsy couldn’t help but to assume this meant it was the news he had been waiting for since his first mission back, four weeks back. Kingsman was going to remove him from the field because of his… _disability_. The young man frowned at the word, wings tensing behind him, hating the way it sounded.

His entire way to Merlin’s office, Eggsy’s mind was filled with all of the things that would have gone better with flight. By the time he got there, Eggsy was frustrated and a little moody because of these thoughts. So, when the man knocked on the tech wizard’s door and entered, the huge smile that had been on Merlin’s face vanished the moment he saw the irritation written all over his lover’s face.

“Leannan (4), what’s wrong?”

“The reason you called me in ‘ere is what’s wrong”, Eggsy snipped.

Merlin narrowed his eyes at him, “What do you mean?”

Rolling his eyes, Eggsy snarked, “Don’ play coy wit me, Merls. I know you called me in ‘ere because Kingsman thinks I’m inefficient without flight. Well you know, wot? Fuck the lot o’ you! I already know I’m more ‘fficient with workin’ wings an’ I don’ need to be reminded and I sure as hell know this shouldn’ mean I can’t work field missions! Even with my _disability_ , I have completed every mission I’ve been given since losin’ my flight without a hitch. So, fuck you if you can’t see that!”

Finished with his rant, Eggsy glared at Merlin, arms crossed and wings flared out behind him in anger, waiting for the man’s response. Merlin sat there, frozen, seeming completely surprised by the agent’s rant. For a moment Eggsy wondered if the older man had thought Eggsy was just going to be okay with being taken out of the field. Then as if someone splashed cold water on him, Merlin blinked at Eggsy before beginning to laugh.

Just as Eggsy was going to go tell him to go shove something up his arse, Merlin said while still chuckling lightly, “Lad, you got it all wrong. Nobody thinks you haven’t been efficient and Kingsman isn’t taking you out of the field because you can’t fly. Quite the opposite, actually.”

“Wot?” Eggsy was stunned. What the hell did he mean quite the opposite?

“Eggsy, I called you in because I’ve finished your prostetics. Your going to fly again, ghaol (5).”

The agent just stared at the tech genius in shock. He was going to fly again. He would be able to fly with his lover; touch the sky and chase the stars. Merlin’s wings shuffled slightly, breaking Eggsy out of his daze. He felt a huge grin stretch across his face as his wings puffed up in excitement. He ran up to the boyfriend and practically tackled him in a hug, only both of their wings flaring out for balance keeping them from falling to the floor. Merlin hugged him back before removing himself from Eggsy’s arms.

“Well do you want to see them or not?”

“Fuck yeah, I do!”

Merlin smiled, wings shuffling once more, and moved behind his desk and pulled out a box. Once it was set on his desk, he opened it up to reveal what looked exactly like of the missing feathers from Eggsy’s wings – four sets: a matching pair of the primary feathers and a matching pair of the secondary feathers – and they were the exact color and length. Eggsy stared at them, jaw dropped as he moved to touch them. They felt hard like metal but without the coldness associated with metal.

“Contrary to appearance the feathers aren’t completely separate but the groups are; meaning the group of primary feathers for the left wing is actually all one prosthetic and the group for the right wing is another. Same thing for the secondaries. Each prosthetic has its own secret weapons of course. For example, the primaries have a possibility to throw hidden knives”, Merlin began to explain as Eggsy ran his hand along one of the ‘feathers’, marveling at the perfect color.

Eggsy looked up and asked, “Wot’re they made of? Feels like metal but if they were as ‘eavy as say, steel, then I wouldn’ be able to fly coz of the weight.”

Just as Merlin opened his mouth to respond, Eggsy interrupted him, “Actually explain later. I’m dying to feel the wind in my wings.”

The tech wizard smirked, “Alright.”

Merlin pulled out some leather straps from the same place he had pulled out the box and began to attach them to the prosthetics. “So, for now the straps don’t blend in like the prosthetics, but I am working on that.”

As Merlin explained how to put the prosthetics on, Eggsy couldn’t help but keep the joy off his face as he realized today would be the first time flying in four months.

…………………………

“Eggsy, this may take more than a single try. As close as they look to being the real thing, they will need some getting used to.”

Eggsy nodded to the man in front of him. They were outside on the lawn of the manor, far away from anybody who would want to come watch. The prosthetics were lighter than he expected. Obviously not as light as his actual feathers, but they were light enough that Eggsy would be able to forget that they were even there while in action.

“Okay one step at a time then, lad. Let’s start with getting off the ground.”

Eggsy spread out his wings as far as they would go and crouched slightly. Slowly, he flapped his powerful wings. Closing his eyes, Eggsy reveled in the feeling of the wind catching some resistance at the prosthetics having missed the feeling before. He began to flap his wings a little bit harder, floating feeling of hovering beginning. Looking down at his feet, the agent realized he was already a couple of feet in the air and smiled. He heard Merlin’s wings begin to flap and when he looked up, the man was eye-level with him once more, wings steadily flapping, blurring the grey-black feathers.

“Good job, lad. Shall we?” Merlin said gesturing away.

“Fuck yes”, Eggsy replied, picking up confidence as the prosthetics felt more and more like his own wings.

The two flew around the manor a couple of times, gaining height with each pass. After a little bit of time, no longer worried about Eggsy’s ability to stay air-borne, the two flew together, enjoying the sky and testing his limits, Eggsy unable to stay quiet. Eggsy never wanted to land, feeling as if he was in a dream with the wind brushing through his feathers like he never thought it would again. However, eventually, the two landed – Merlin gracefully and Eggsy with a little bit of trouble – so they could go home. They were both securely on the ground and walking back into the mansion, hand in hand, when Eggsy suddenly stopped the two of them and kissed Merlin.

Once he ended the kiss, Eggsy rested his forehead against his lover’s, and whispered, “Thank you for givin’ me back my wings, Alasdair.”

Merlin smiled and captured his lips in another kiss and then said, “Of course, leth eile de m 'anam (6). It was my pleasure, if only to keep you smiling.”

Eggsy smiled and brought them in for one more kiss before continuing to walk through the mansion, realizing that he had never needed wings in order to touch the sky; all he needed was Merlin. Becoming flightless had made him feel lost, but it was Merlin who found him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) Gràdh mo chridhe: love of my heart  
> (2) leannan: lover  
> (3) mo leth eile: my other half  
> (4) leannan: lover  
> (5) ghaol: love  
> (6) leth eile de m 'anam: other half of my soul

**Author's Note:**

> I'm neither a doctor or a wing expert so I apologize if my time frame for injuries doesn't make sense as well as my reasoning behind Eggsy loosing his ability to fly. Please just go with it. Also I don't really know how the prosthetics work or what they are made of any more than you do so again just go with it. What I imagine for it looks good, what comes out with words doesn't so my solution was exactly what I put in the story.


End file.
